Ms. RuPaul has been snatching lace-front weaves for nine seasons now—with two extra all-star seasons—but for the first time, the drag queen decided to make a bold decision; no one was going home the first episode. Yes y’all, the first time in history (or as they call it, HERstory). But episode two was a return of a classic queen… or may I say, the CuCu queen! Yes y’all, Ms. Congeniality of Season 8, Ms. Cynthia Lee Fontaine shook her bootay to the new season of RuPaul’s Drag Race as the mysterious 14th queen to the show (no mysterious, cause I already knew a while back, but still… no spoilers y’all).
This episode, they had to be split into two teams and perform a RuPaul special cheerleading anthem. To me, this was a bit of a “mehhh” concept because, if anything, this type of routine has been spread onto several seasons with essences of chants, sing-a-longs and over-the-top dance routines. So, there wasn’t anything interesting or particularly memorable with this episode. But surprisingly, it was the choreography that was the gag! Each member done a bunch of cartwheels, the splits, tumbles, etc. UGGGGHHH the list goes on and on!
On the runway, they let it all out in white and waltz the stage in glamour, sophistication and effortless beauty. So, let’s take a look of each queen and my review of each performance/look.
Aja didn’t really stick out in the cheerleading performance. Like many of them, they all had a small moment and nothing particularly engaging. But her White look to me was a blend of BDSM meets white-as-hell huntress walking through some gothic-like forest with the queen’s signature sharp make-up. I like the look, especially the addition of the face mark which gave it a more “sassy” touch-up, but I just wish there was JUST A LITTLE BIT (just a smidgen… a tinsy bit… a little wee bit) more detail with the look. Just something to round the detail of the dress, cause it was plain at times. But still workable gurl! (BOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Ohhhhhh yes… the actress. Ironically, acting wasn’t the big fundamental about this challenge because… well, it’s a cheerleading contest. So, no gurl (just kidding, your fierce Alexis). As for the cheerleading chant, she was also one that didn’t stand out but it wasn’t her fault. There wasn’t enough to cover her ass or showcase her talents as a performance, which is a shame because she’s a fierce queen. As for the look, I was mixed at the start. First, I loved the dress; I thought it was stunning and worked well for the queen’s body! But as we get to the make-up, it’s a little bad for me. The eye brow is too strong, and looks like a smudge if anything (no shade). The hair?… mehhh. (BOOT: PERFORMANCE / BOOT: LOOK)
Another queen who didn’t managed to stand out unfortunately, but the issue here was that, in comparison to the other queens, you can vividly tell that Ms. Charlie Hides is no flexible queen. That’s okay, cause no one has to be, but there was bound to be a body-moving type of challenge, so unfortunately, it didn’t work in her favour. BUT CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE LOOK! Holy damn, one of the best of the nights! It’s a real snow-queen matriarch-ish type of dress that works well with her polished and well-balanced make-up and hair! Extraordinary gurl! (BOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Cynthia Lee Fontaine
BOOM! She sure knows how to move! Cynthia has always been a high energy type of queen, so she swerved this challenge with her over-the-top-ness, her sass and infectious humour. I also loved the look; very old-fashioned but gorgeous and very classy for a queen like her. However, the style is a very Cynthia look, so hopefully she is able to look at influences outside of the box. (TOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
For a big queen, she sure knows how to move! She done the splits, she done the flips, the rolls, and served it out! Plus, her energy level was quite high and I was suspecting an inner-flexiness in their, and she sure brought it! The look was just as great; well-polished, perfect amount of contrast between her skin and clothes, and the make-up… of course, is on point! I would have like a longer pair of trousers though, because the length bothers me a bit. Or even make them wider or flowy… just something is a bit off. (TOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Farrah Moan didn’t serve it fishy or over-the-top last week, but for this challenge, she was in her element! She was fun and flirty, and her performance was good, but just didn’t stand out to a maximum potential—hopefully she’ll hit a homerun for the next challenge. But I loved the look; it’s giving me Vegas masquerade-bash type of realness, and I live for that gig! (TOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Poor Ms. Mansfield (that is Jayme’s of course). I too was rooting for the queen, but she just didn’t serve it for this episode. The performance was super campy but also lazy, which didn’t highlight her wacky humour. Unfortunately, it was lacklustre enough to get her kicked off after one lip-sync, which is unfortunate because, even though she sounded very lost and sub-conscious, she sure had the personality and charm. But as for the look, it was like Marilyn Monroe-realness! Without a doubt one of my favourite looks on the episode (YES Y’ALL!) (BOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Oh dear Kimora. Here’s the thing; I think she’s a talent queen and tight-polished one too, but her attitude and… well, dense comments in some areas, aren’t paving her a successful route in the competition. She appears as a slutty (excuse my language *sigh*) cheerleader, but the only sluttiness is… well, nothing for the challenge. And as far as the White look, it’s cute and definitely fun, but I agree with Michelle Visage; it’s not entirely white. I would have left the bra coloured, but everything else white or cut into pieces. Just didn’t successfully execute well. (BOOT: PERFORMANCE / BOOT: LOOK)
Nina Bo’Nina Brown
Yuss queen, bring it on!! I love me some Nina Bo’Nina realness, and her sassy attitude with the extra padding for her cheeleading performance was killer! At first, her White outfit looked a little rough on first glance, having a pretty basic swimsuit and thigh-highs. But after a few more glances, it all came together quite cohesively; a glamazon goddess serving it at a rich home near a large-as-hell pool side! Now that’s intergalatic glamour gurls and boyz! (TOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Just like Farrah’s performance, Peppermint was unfortunately cast away because of a pretty lacklustre script for her. But during those times, she did belt out a pretty stellar performance and was entirely fun with the choreography—but the shade she threw at the other contestants? Gurrrrrrrlllll… Nah I still think your fierce Peppermint! But gurl, that runway look? No… I’m sorry, but she has a thing for covering her body (Honey Mahogany anyone) that makes the shape a little unflattering, which is not cute. (BOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Sasha has come out from her “artsy” stereotype and has been able to show a crazy, over-the-top sassy side of herself, which is good. And what other place to show that than the challenge; she didn’t look attractive or remotely polished, which made it quite sensible for her character, and she allowed herself to do some out-of-it choreography. Quite cool if I have to be honest! And her look for the White runway? Stunning, of course. It’s quintessential as always! (TOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Okay y’all, those back-flips, cartwheels and splits? Shook me to death, and brought me to life again with that fierce as Barbarella-Madonna-esque body suit she wore on the runway! Slay for the days! But I agree with what Ms. Michelle said; MORE PADDING to work them clothes queen! (TOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Trinity is another queen I had underestimated; she has served some pretty wicked looks, but her White runway appearance was futuristic Pierrot 90’s realness! Funky yet very glamorous! As for her performance, she has really become a bit of a funny one too, which I never thought she would be able to master, considering that a lot of those pageant girls don’t necessarily have that funny bone. But hey y’all, it’s not the end of the world, and clearly she served it well, so y’all ain’t got nothing to worry! (TOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Valentina has been a bit of an underdog with self-assuring cofidence and high-quality star power! And man, it sure did come out well in the performance! As Michelle said, when the lights were not on her, she still managed to capture our attention; that’s a star right thuuuurr! And the traditional Latina virgin wedding dress choice was probably the best than anyone’s look on the episode! It was extremely well presented, well executed and probably one of the best looks I’ve seen in a while.COM! (Yusssssss, come through queen!) (TOOT: PERFORMANCE / TOOT: LOOK)
Verdict? Valentina hands down! Luckily, she was the winner of this weeks challenge and she sure serve fish, glamour and body realness on the platter for all these other queens to taste (not literally, but yeah…). Other queens to look out for in the future is of course the creative genius Nina Bo’Nina Brown and Sasha Velour, and another glam diva Shea Coulee, whom channel fierceness in their own eclectic ways!
Unfortunately, Kimora Blac and Jaymes Mansfield fell in the bottom two. To be honest, that lip-sync was boring as hell and a little dull. There was no spark in the B52’s number “Love Shack”, which is a BLOODY ICONIC 80’S ANTHEM NOT TO F UP! But I guess Kimora’s constant movement and sex-kitten appeal to the judges allowed her to stay, while Ms. Mansfield got the Sashay Away from RuPaul. What do you think about my views? Good, bad, mediocre? Comment below and let me know what you think!